Dear Person Who Rewrites Nightmares,
I had a nightmare years ago, which I still think about because it was so weird: I have these odd blackheads on my nose and I go to the bathroom mirror to investigate and, up close, I can see that my nose has a bunch of tiny craters in it. Inside each crater is a different colored, tiny, disc-shaped sponge with a design on it. Children’s designs, like a duck, or a flower. So I flick a few of them out with my fingernail. They land in the sink below and immediately begin growing in size. I think “What the heck is causing this?”, so I unhinge my nose to look inside my face. (Because it has a little hinge at the bottom so I can flip my nose open like a little trap door.) And, once my nose is flipped open, inside my face is a little wooden Popeye the Sailor doll. And that’s the moment that I woke up in a cold sweat.
You woke up too soon! A moment later a woman poked her head in the door and said, “sir? They’re almost ready to start shooting; I just wanted to check the mask.” The woman, who you realized was the special effects artist hired to create your mask for the new Tim Burton movie in which you were playing the villain, hurried over. You blinked, finally starting to come out of the daze left over from the phenomenal nap you’d just taken.
“Sorry about that,” you said as she carefully closed the nose and replaced the tiny sponges. “The chair in my luxury trailer is so comfortable, I nodded off and woke up not sure where I was.”
“No harm done,” she grinned. “Though I’m surprised you can sleep with all the excitement. Everyone’s buzzing about your Oscar nomination.”
You smiled but before you could reply, your assistant came in and told you they were ready for you on the set, and you went off to make your fortune.